"K" is currently almost 28 months. She wears underwear during her wake times, and diapers for nap and bedtime. She stays dry really well during the day because we have a routine schedule that offers her potty breaks. She can now tell her parents "Potty!" when she needs to go, which she previously would not do. Earlier in the year, she was still dependent on her parents to tell her when to go potty, but now she can tell us when she needs an extra potty visit.
Let's be real about POOP... Yuck! Most of the time, "K" will wait for nap or bedtime when she has a diaper to poop. Recently she has told her parents when she needed to poop, and pushed out a little bit on the toilet! This progress was met with great enthusiasm! Occasionally, "K" still poops in her underwear. :-/ Is it to be expected? Unfortunately, yes. For many kids, getting poop-trained comes gradually months after being pee-trained.
She can pull her underwear up, but not down. She still requires help getting on and off the toilet. Her gross motor skills were a bit late to bloom in general.
"K" will happily go potty in other bathrooms or stores with her potty seat that we carry in a backpack.
What was the process of moving from part time Elimination Communication (EC) to underwear?
Ms. Harmony decided in January that Toddler "K" understood what her body was doing, and had the focus/discipline to correctly manage her bodily functions. For the first few days, Ms. Harmony and "K" played in only one room of the house with the rug rolled up. She was bare from the waist down, although due to it being the middle of winter, she did wear a long sleeve shirt and leg warmers. To give incentive to "K," she was rewarded with M&Ms for using the potty. If she peed on the floor instead, she was required to clean it up (of course Ms. Harmony helped with this process).
Although "K" really wanted the M&Ms, she also was exercising her toddler independence and would not pee where she was supposed to, although she knew what she was doing and where she was supposed to go. Ms. Harmony decided that wiping up pee puddles was not the correct consequence after the first day because it was not producing the desired behavior.
So, the next day Ms. Harmony told "K" again that it was important to learn to use the potty like a big girl. She could put her pee in the potty and get a M&M. Or, she could put her pee on the floor. Ms. Harmony would clean it up, and EAT THE M&M because Ms. Harmony had done all the work. THIS WAS THE GOLDEN TICKET! Toddler "K" cried and cried when Mom ate her M&Ms, whereas before she did not really care about wiping up the puddle and missing out on the M&M.
Then Ms. Harmony made it a game. Children readily learn when there is an element of fun, or funny. Ms. Harmony would talk to herself out loud saying, "I really hope "K" pees on the floor! I really want to eat M&Ms! "K" should not sit on the potty! No she should not!" Every time "K" would sit on the potty, and especially when she peed on the potty, Ms. Harmony would pretend to cry and give "K" the M&Ms. "Oh man! I wanted to eat those M&Ms, but "K" gets them instead because she peed on the potty!" (Wail, fake crying. You get the idea.) Toddler "K" would laugh and laugh about taking the M&Ms for herself. She would try to go potty often because even if she could squeeze out a drop, she got the M&Ms and a big production from mom.
After 3 days of bare-bottom training, we added training underwear and worked daily after that to maintain the skills. Some days were "wetter" than others. But for the most part, "K" made steady improvement. We have been able to take her out and not worry that she will have an accident for months now. Hurray for freedom from diapers! Hurray for confidence that she will stay dry even if we aren't at home!
Would Ms. Harmony do it again this way, or would she just wait? Some kids can train in 3 days and never have an accident after that.
Yes, think of the all the diapers I've saved in the past 6 months.
Yes, looking back I'd still do the same thing even though it seems like a lot of work. Her personality is the biggest reason for training her this way. Toddler "K" thrives on routine and gradual transitions (bottles to sippy cups, crib to toddler bed, meeting someone new, going on play ground equipment, etc). "K" wants to do what she's always done and is very resistant to change or new expectations. Basically, by beginning her potty training before she was 2 years old, it allowed her to cement the new skills before she could remember any different. At 28 months, it's highly unlikely she even remembers wearing diapers all day. Basically, I felt the longer she was in diapers, the more aware she would be of that being "the norm," and the more resistant she would be to potty learning later. I wanted to form potty habits, not diaper dependence habits.
Going forward, these are the skills related to potty training that she still needs to work on:
- pulling down her own shorts and underwear
- getting on and off the toilet
- redressing independently
- pooping in the toilet
- staying dry through nap and bed time
